A Texas voice
Getting ready to come back home
Steve MARTAINDALE

Some six weeks away from my return home, my wife has begun preparing me for what changes might expect to find. She's been quick to remind me that I was barely in our new home for two months before leaving for Antarctica. She will have had more than four months without me before I'm back.

“We hadn't even found places for everything by the time you left,” she told me. “I'm all settled in now; you may have some new things to get used to.”

She doesn't know the half of it.

The first thing that comes to mind is that I cannot expect to get up, walk downstairs and find a full breakfast waiting for me. Or meals already prepared every lunch and dinner. Or to be able to walk into the galley 24 hours a day and get a fresh cup of coffee.

Speaking of meals, will I find that I've become accustomed to having the option of dessert at any meal? And that's not even considering the near-constant presence of Frosty Boy, the popular soft serve ice cream, sometimes with hot fudge topping.

There may also be some adjustment to just dropping off my dishes after eating and letting someone else wash them. Or the fact that janitors clean the restrooms and mop the floors every day. But, on the other hand, I will no longer have to get up early on a Sunday just to have a chance of finding an open washer and dryer for laundering my clothes.

I will also have to get reacquainted with the idea of seeing insects, of swatting flies and slapping mosquitoes. I hope it won't surprise me whenever a bird swoops by or a cat comes around a corner. There may also be some getting used to mowing the yard and raking leaves. After I get comfortable seeing green and growing things again. And, if I work up a sweat, I'll not have to worry about it possibly freezing me later.

There will undoubtedly be some adjusting to seeing cars and trucks driving faster than 5 mph. Not to mention getting behind the wheel, myself, for the first time in more than four months ... to drive to the grocery store ... to buy groceries.

Weather, of course, is the factor most people think about first. By the time I leave Antarctica, it will be getting cold again – temperatures around or below zero instead of the balmy 20s we're getting now. Texas will be warming up again and soon I will be able to go outside without pulling on a jacket. I'll be able to stay outside for extended periods without putting on layers of gear and taking various precautions.

Soon, my arms and legs may again see sunshine and my feet will feel fresh air. Well, the air may not be as fresh as it is here, but it won't hurt as much. I will have to start watching the skies a little more closely, especially as tornado season bears down on Texas. While you can get storms in Antarctica, notably high winds, you do not fear the destructive forces of a twister, nor are you likely to ever see lightning or feel liquid precipitation.

I'll have to get used to phoning people by pressing one or two buttons, or just speaking a name into the cell phone, instead of the 36 numbers I must dial now to call stateside. I may get frustrated trying to find people when I get back home. At McMurdo Station, there just are not many places to hide. Arriving and departing personnel are listed daily on the bulletin board and on the intranet. Even strangers are likely to return a phone call and be nice about it. Almost everyone monitors e-mail and everyone's address is available online.

Yep, there will be some adjustments, like sharing a bed and not having to pull on pants to make a visit to the restroom during the night. But have patience. I'm confident I'll modify my lifestyle just fine.

Steve Martaindale is a self-syndicated columnist. Write him at penmanmail-steve@yahoo. com.